Stage 1:  Denial and Isolation

This can't be happening.  He/she will come back, get better, want to stay married.

Stage 2:  Anger

How can he/she have rejected me?  It's not my fault.  He/she has changed.  I hope he/she dies.  Guilt about angry feelings can cause depression.

Stage 3:  Bargaining

"If we get help"

"If I'm better"

"If I'm good, we will get back together."

Stage 4:  Depression

Self-pity, feelings of hopelessness and rumination about lost plans for the future.  Reality sets in.  Increase in alcohol or drug use may occur to dull the pain.

Stage 5:  Acceptance

It's over.  I need to make adjustments.  I  need to get a balance in my social life, get my career on track, do my best with parenting, and get on with my life.